Soda Naranja (Orange/Mandarin Soda)
When you visit a taco truck, ask for a “soda naranja”. Even if you don’t care for orange soda, understand that this is what real caballeros wash down tacos with when it’s too early to drink beer. It’s imperative for these few major reasons:
- This will effectively establish the fact that you know just WTF you’re talking about. This may keep them from putting lettuce and tomatoes on your tacos. If you walk away from a taco stand with lettuce and tomatoes on
your taco, I hate to break it to you, Ace- but you’ve failed.
- Orange soda goes great with genuine tacos.
- Because real tacos are chased with either cold beer or cold orange soda. That’s the way it is, and if you don’t like it, go to Casa Ole and drink a bunch of crappy honky margaritas that were composed with that artificial sweet and sour stuff that kiddie popsicles are made of, and while you’re at it, enjoy some crispy ground-beef pseudo-tacos that might consist of floor scraps purchased from the Alpo factory.
- It tastes a lot better than the US version of orange soda
- The thick glass and large bumps on the neck of the bottle are designed to make it an optimal weapon, in the case someone should try to take your taco or salsa from you.
Disclaimer: If anyone reading this happens to be from somewhere other than Texas or California, I understand that quasi-Mexican food can be very palatable, and you may not even have access to a Taco Bell. I love this country, and every night I think of you and weep, swallowing the fact that many of my fellow Americans may never experience real tacos. Or real salsa.
Damn.
Dammit, I live in Virginia and pretty much the closest thing we get to tacos here is Taco Bell. I have to look at all your taco pictures and get jealous. Taco Bell sucks.
I plan on posting some taco recipes soon. Stick around!